Asanga was a Buddhist philosopher. He had encountered a very complicated problem that he couldn't seem to work through. He decided to go and meditate in a cave, hoping to contact Manjusri, the bodhisattva of wisdom.
Bodhisattvas are believed to be beings who have come into an understanding of nirvana, the final blissful state, but have decided not to enter that oneness with the universe out of compassion for those of us who have not yet reached that place of understanding. The bodhisattvas become teachers, mystical guides, devoting themselves to the salvation of others who seek nirvana.
So, Asanga, the Buddhist philosopher, went to the mountain to meditate and try to reach Manjusri, the bodhisattva of wisdom. He sat for a long, long time, then noticed water dripping from the ceiling of the cave. He realized he had been there for three years already. He noticed that the water in those three years had worn away the stone, so he thought if he stayed with his meditation, he would be able to transform into another state as well.
After nine years and no change, Asanga gave up and left the cave. Just then, an old dog with a terrible wound in its side came along. Asanga's heart was filled with compassion -- he took the dog in his arms, cleaned the wound and bound up the dog's side. There were maggots in the wound. Out of compassion even for the maggots, Asanga cut off a piece of his own flesh and placed the maggots on it.
After he helped heal the dog, he noticed a great radiance about him and saw Manjusri standing next to him. "Where have you been?" Asanga said "Why have you not come during all these years of my meditation?" Manjusri replied,"I've been here all the time. I've been sitting right next to you. Look at your robe. You can see lint from my robe on your robe."
"Why couldn't I see you?" Asanga asked
"The one act of compassion that you undertook for this dog did more to awaken you to see me than all the nine years of sitting in the cave."
"Gifts are great," wrote Buddha, "the founding of temples meritorious, meditations and religious exercise pacify the heart, comprehension of truth leads to Nirvana. Greater than all is loving kindness. As the light of the moon is sixteen times stronger than the light of all the stars, so is loving kindness sixteen times more productive than all other religious accomplishments taken together."
Multitudes have been plagued since the beginning of humankind with the quest for the comprehensive answer to our being. What is its ultimate outcome or origin, what is its full meaning or potential? How can all this make sense, how can I make sense of my life?
When I was in chaplaincy training at a hospital in Milwaukee, I encountered a woman whose need to define her life within the grander scheme of things was tormenting her.
I met her during my first week, new to the job and, frankly, uneasy about working in a primarily Catholic and Lutheran hospital as a Unitarian Universalist in the Midwest. (I later discovered that it was not my liberal religious perspective that created the most distrust towards me -- not even my gender -- the distrust among other chaplains emerged when it became known that I was from New York City.)
As I walked to my floor, I was approached by a nurse's aid who cornered me next to the patients' elevators. "You're the chaplain", she said. "Yes." I replied, though it sounded awkward to me and I couldn't avoid the uniform... The elevator door opened and as a patient was being wheeled out, in full voice, she said. "Then you must know that the end of the world is upon us. We have to pray, we have to pray for all the lost souls."
Now this was after my second year in Seminary. I had tried to imagine the difficulties I would have as a non-creedal minister, but I hadn't anticipated this one from a staff member. Fortunately I had already studied Revelations which was the source of her assumptions. It was a little disconcerting having this conversation in the middle of the hall, and it seemed that each time the elevator opened she would proclaim with a tone that implied my agreement a statement like "isn't the Prince of Darkness walking amongst us, the devil is here."
I am thankful that I was able to follow the language and symbology so that she could articulate her deep anxiety and despair. In fact, that was one of my primary reasons to go to a liberal Christian Seminary -- so that I could learn the language and read the Bible to know more of the overall religious sensibility of most of the Western Culture. And I agree with a line in one of my favorite movies, Inherit The Wind, that the Bible is a good book, but not the only book....
Soon we were able to speak of her fear for her own soul and the souls of her loved ones who she felt were not responding to the obvious signs of the end of the world. She felt she wasn't praying enough, she wasn't doing enough, she wasn't acting in a way that her God would accept her when the impending destruction would happen. She had worked herself into a slow panic, believing there would not be enough time to become the perfect faithful performer she assumed she had to be.
I realized as I was listening to her that she was no longer invested in the potential of her life. She was seeking a formula for dying. This nurse's aid, self-condemned and in fear of those she loved, was 21 years old. Although she was good at her work, the tyranny of this fatalistic self definition gave her a feeling of impotence, of inner confusion; she was clearly giving up on peace of mind and peace on earth.
Fortunately, it was a grace -filled encounter. She heard me as I began to speak about the quality of her living. I pointed out that as a nurse's aid, she was in the practice of loving and that each loving action was a kind of prayer. I reminded her that her concern for her friends and family was an expression of the love in her life -- the love of Life...of her God. She was praying enough, consciously and sub-consciously. I tried to assure her that historically communities have thought that the world was coming to an end and that it did not happen, that we cannot ultimately know about our ending.
An avenue of communication was formed and we discussed her anxieties now and again throughout the summer. She helped me see how compelling despair could be. How it can, in fact, immobilize us. This challenged me to seek ways to heal her formula for dying with faith in the potential for living. Her spirituality needed a connection to the life she was living and the simplicity of her acts of kindness in her work was the way toward that new perspective.
"The Universe responds," claims Alice Walker, "what you ask of it, it gives...love will overflow every sanctuary given it. Truth will grow where the fertilizer that nourishes it is also truth. Faith will be its own reward..."
"Why yearn for a promised land?" asks Taoist Deng Ming-Dao,"The true land is in your heart...Express yourself. That is meaning...Tao is the road of your life."
In any religion there are the voices that call us to our life and its ultimate importance. "God is a living god," so Jesus proclaimed to doubters looking for definitive answers. "God is not a God of the dead." The wealth of our experience gives us the knowledge of our lives. What we are in our daily lives is a part of what existence is, the choices we make help create the world. The world is what we make of it.
It is often hard to imagine that our lives can ultimately affect the future. It is also hard not to have all the answers.
And yet it is these two truths that must be embraced for the increased healing of the world. When we realize that our actions ultimately effect the future of our lives, we are then compelled to take action. And when we embrace, at the same time, that we do not have all the answers, we won't wait for nine years in whatever cave we create for ourselves before living our lives. We won't expect to have it all together beforewalking our walk. We won't seek perfection before taking our stride.
Further, knowing that we do not know everything keeps us aware of others and their potential to enhance our understanding. This gives us more cause for compassion, for we are effecting our future understanding by enhancing another's life.
We praise our existence through life sustaining acts of love. And we are here to die, to understand the preciousness of this gift of life by bearing mortality.
A number of members and friends of this community are a part of the Second Annual Susquehana AIDS walk in Havre de Grace. People of all walks of life, rich in the diversity of age and culture, are sharing this morning by claiming their passion for healing: healing the sick, healing the brokenness, healing the destructive ignorance, healing the hate. These folk have brought themselves to a place of understanding, seeing the compassion in each other's eyes, knowing the hurt that finds comfort.
Any life experience enhances knowledge of self and circumstance, no matter how mundane it may seem, how routine. There is a depth to any endeavor we take on, in any walk of life we choose to pursue. All roads can lead to the path of greater understanding. Inch by inch, step by step, we walk together in various ways throughout our lives.
Each of us must find the ways we can walk the talk of our deepest desires for peace, justice and compassion. Each of us must encourage another to praise life by simple acts of kindness.
The nurse's aid in Milwaukee who was so sure that her lack of prayer stamina was adversely effecting the outcome of the world was not totally off base. She understood that what she did in life sent ripple effects throughout the human family. What she didn't understand was that she will never have all the answers, that she alone will never heal the world. We do it in increments. Step by step. One act of kindness after another. One bold act of love after another. One defiance of hate after another. One praising of life's gifts after another. Together. With each other. We can change the world.
So may it be. Amen.
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