Then said a rich man, Speak to us of giving. (The prophet) answered: You give but little when you give of your possessions. It is when you give of yourself that you truly give. For what are possessions but things you keep and guard for fear you may need them tomorrow? And what is fear of need but need itself? Is not dread of thirst when your well is full, the thirst that is unquenchable? There are those who give little of the much which they have and they give it for recognition and their hidden desire makes their gifts unwholesome. And there are those who have little and give it all. These are the believers in life and the bounty of life, and their coffer is never empty. There are those who give with joy, and that joy is their reward. And there are those who give with pain, and that pain is their baptism. And there are those who give and know not pain in giving, nor do they seek joy, nor give with mindfulness of virtue; they give as in yonder valley the myrtle breathes its fragrance into space. Through the hands of such as these (The Eternal) speaks, and from behind their eyes ... smiles upon the earth. It is well to give when asked, but it is better to give unasked, through understanding; ... All you have shall some day be given; Therefore give now, that the season of giving may be yours and not your inheritors'. You often say, "I would give, but only to the deserving." The trees in your orchard say not so, nor the flocks in your pasture. They give that they may live, for to withhold is to perish ... See first that you yourself deserve to be a giver, and an instrument of giving. For in truth it is life that gives unto life while you, who deem yourself a giver, are but a witness.
"It is when you give of yourself that you truly give ..."
Today marks the beginning of this year's canvass drive. For most churches and amongst colleagues, it tends to be an anxious time. "Will we get what we need?" "Will we fund our staff?" "Will people agree to support the church?" "Will we have to give more up?" Rarely is it a time of celebration, a time of praising our power to make things happen, to strengthen our religious home.
More often than not, we give into our fears and regard money as something that has power over us, rather than money as a tool which empowers us to reach our goals. We rarely speak of money as being on our side ... money for us not against us.
When I examine my own apprehensions around canvass time, I realize that I have grown in my understanding of stewardship. Through the twelve campaigns I've witnessed, my worries have moved from whether my position will be funded to whether I have helped in communicating the worth of Unitarian Universalism in the life of the community and the world. There are many factors as to why a canvass falls short of its goal, but one sure fire way for a canvass to miss the mark is if those asked to support the work fail to see its worth.
Sure there have been some years where my throat was caught in the cultural taboo of talking about money. And, sure, other years, I have been worried about the amount of privilege in Unitarian Universalist congregations, privilege that diverts any sense of urgency in our message of justice and freedom because too many of our lives are comfy cosy. Sometimes pledges reflect a lackluster support for a nice place to see nice friends. I'm beginning to see that the canvass is not about survival, really, nor about honorable obligation, it's about understanding. It is not about desperation. It's about choice. It's not about filling a need. It's about seeing the larger picture.
"It is well to give when asked, but it is better to give unasked, through understanding."
The understanding that is called for in giving is many layered. It is an understanding of one's personal power to communicate value and to put forth energy toward a vision. It is an understanding of self in relation, that what we endeavor to do with our resources effects and supports others. It is an understanding of connection, an interplay of life energy and priority. Putting our efforts toward what we can imagine.
"Congregations need money as any other person, group, or organization to exist and to flourish." writes Edward Landreth in his guide, Fund-raising With A Vision, "Money is one of the many gifts that members need to provide to realize the congregation's shared vision. If negative perceptions of money are allowed to get in the way of a congregation addressing its money issues, the life of the congregation is continually hampered by a shortage of resources ... when talking only about needs and the dollars and cents of individual expenditures," Landreth continues, "the subject appears to focus on money, which can be boring and irritating over time. When the conversation is framed about vision and goals, and what funds are needed to achieve them, money has a spiritual meaning in terms of the life of the congregation."
If our logic for survival is ruled by money, then our decisions will be two dimensional. They will be based on a sense of scarcity, on limits. The vision of resources will tend to be short-sighted and reactive, laced with suspicion and blame, fueled by a sense of helplessness and discouragement. The ruler of logic will be money, which will get too much credit for your survival. Money need not be in charge. It is a tool to be used in our expression of value.
Now I can hear all sorts of thoughts rising up. "I value this place much more than the money I can give," "Just because I don't have money doesn't mean what I give has no value." "I do value this place and I'm doing the best I can!!!!!" Whoa. Whoa.
It's not about the amount you give. It's about the intention in your giving. It's not about solving a mathematical problem. It's about extending ourselves toward what we imagine can be. It's about a venture not a conclusion.
If you are giving all that you can give, then you are giving what this community needs to survive. And it is only you who can know whether you are extending yourself as much as you can, loving your neighbor as yourself. It's not about sacrifice. Martyrdom and money do not mix well. It's about empowerment. Making what you value, what strengthens your sense of self a living walking working reality. And simply by giving what you can of your resources, you've made that dream a little more real.
Here are some ways that the rule of money works against our ability to imagine.
I have heard several times about a hesitancy for people to join because "membership costs the church money." This is because we pay dues to our denominational support network for valuable service in terms of training, research, networking and connection. The connection to these structures is far more valuable than the dues we send. And the money used to engage a new member comes back manifold, more often than not, in increased wisdom, energy and life story. Besides, if folk are engaging in this community, using its facility, being supported by staff, then they are already costing money. The hesitation to join to avoid cost is illogical and gives money way too much power. In fact, this logic of money prevents the staff to know the real number of people engaging in the community. This logic of money prevents realistic assessment of what is actually occurring.
We have pulled together within our fund-raisers superbly this fiscal year. Low end estimates were for $20,000. By the end of this fiscal year we will have raised over $30,000. For a membership of 137, that is remarkable, indeed. However, it also indicates that we as a community are not pledging what we can. If we had pledged even one third of the raised amount, $10,000, we could have had custodial presence, or we could have had more consistent musical presence on Sunday morning, or we could have kept 15 secretarial hours instead of the 12 weekly hours we cherish today.
The extent of extra giving and focus on fund-raisers this year has been impressive, but the logic of money can influence a congregation to hold back on its giving, to, in fact, underestimate its ability to give, out of a sense of scarcity, a sense that money has more relevance than our vision. With this logic ruled by a sense of scarcity, we cannot plan the way we would like, for we cannot know what will come our way without commitment.
Holding back in this congregation at this time could mean that you will continue to ask the staff to clean bathrooms and take out garbage. Nothing inherently wrong in that task, simply not what we are called to do here. Holding back during this pledge drive could mean asking the worship committee, once again, to barter and beg for guest speakers to offer their gifts of wisdom for a less than proper honorarium. Holding back during this time of visioning for the next year, could mean confining your expertise and generous spirit for yet another year of focus on fund-raisers -- slowly but surely making any social event we may have about raising or spending money. Imagine what we could do with the stunning intellectual, emotional, creative energy that you comprise if our budget would fund its blossoming. Of course we will need to do fund-raisers next year and in the near future, but I know we could need them less ... right now.
Oh ... I can hear the wrenching stomach, the knot turning around within it. "I'm not holding back!" says that knot. "I'm doing the best I can!" Believe it. It's important that we believe each other. Step out of the blame camp. That's not what this is about. Step out of the drama of guilt. What this community needs is for you to do the best you can. That energy will fuel its vision.
If you are already there ... Hallelujah ... well done ... you get it! Help others understand. Pledge drives are not about getting blood from a stone, they are about awakening the community to its potential, reminding the community of its worth, and encouraging free and responsible intention to give toward its health. It is not about the amount. It's about the intention. What you come up with is what you work with. Period. Your choice.
And that's why tithing makes perfect sense. I'm telling you, growing up in a Unitarian Universalist environment, I never thought I'd say tithing is a good way to go, but I get it now. There are two essential aspects to tithing which, when done with integrity, empowers a religious community toward its vision:
If we relegate our pledging to discretionary income -- whatever is left over after the "important" bills -- then you are relegating the value of this community as an afterthought, a leftover. A take or leave element in your life. If you consider your pledge as a part of your entertainment budget, say, missing a dinner or two so that you could give to your church, then you are saying that this community is part of your entertainment. That the minister and DRE and social justice work and village of all ages is in the entertainment business. If you equate your pledge with time given and treat that as good as money, then you are forgetting that no amount of folding orders of service will pay for the lighting that helps you read them in a heated building. No matter how many hours of work you choose to give, it will not pay staff salaries. Money is a reality that all members must acknowledge.
What do you imagine this place to be for you? Do you spend at least 2% of your time in and amongst this community? Do the stories and ideas shared here accompany at least 2% of your thoughts? Does this place give you at least 2% of your year's fulfillment? If so, then why not honor that with at least 2% of your income?
If this place is merely an afterthought, a catch as catch can diversion or occasional entertainment, then pledge that way. There's no blame, no guilt. If you don't value this congregation as an important part of your life, then don't support it as such. And don't expect it to be there without your support. That's the beauty of our principles ... freedom and responsibility. You get what you give. Your choice. It's that simple.
I believe most of you will make a different choice. I believe you know how important the folk around you are. I believe you see the beauty of our endeavor ... At least I hope you do. And that's part of a minister's anxiety ... if you don't see your beauty and the power of our endeavor together ... then I'm just not getting through. But even then ... so may it be.
"All you have shall some day be given;" cautions Kahlil Gibran, "Therefore give now, that the season of giving may be yours ... See first that you yourself deserve to be a giver, and an instrument of giving."
Now there are people in congregations who give more than most so that others can be supported. They see it, blessedly, as part of their good works to do so. And in general, people will give more especially when they see that others are doing the best they can. They give out of the joy of giving -- not to feel used. It's important to simply look into your own priorities and make the best choice you can. You will be surprised by the power of that choice and the abundance that follows.
As our visibility increases, so does public conversation about us. My husband comes home on a fairly regularly basis with anecdotes of local conversations he has had. When people inquire why he moved here, he tells them that we relocated because of my job. "Oh that church," is a common response, with a connecting assumption of our character and worth.
Here are but a few comments either he or I have heard: "I won't step foot on that property, because they have witches there ...." "At least I don't lead a church full of homosexuals" "That church? Everyone hates that church." "That's the church where you don't believe in God."
Not to mention the periodic love notes and offerings I collect at the front entrance of this building, ranging from outright fear for our souls to benevolent prodding into Bible-bound religion. And of course, I receive audible scoffs when at a public gathering I have been asked to lead an invocation. It is because I use inclusive language, offering many images and paths toward sacred living.
We are very definitely a unique presence in this County. We are the only intentionally welcoming congregation, opening our doors to gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender peoples in Harford County. If we choose not to support even this one part of our vision, there will be people who will have no other religious community where they can be sure to celebrate their whole selves in this County.
This is a congregation where people lift their hearts to both God and Gaia, to the sacred in nature or the mystical beyond ... where people call to the seven directions one day and practice another form of religious communion on another day ... where ancient spiritualities are honored and the Bible seriously considered ... a place where a three year olds' uttering has worth and an 80 year olds' wisdom is welcomed. This is a faith community that can hear with open hearts a seeker saying "I don't know if I believe in a god or goddess, but I want a religious community." It is a place where that person who is struggling with vulnerable questions will be taken in and told, "come, let us support your faith journey till you feel a sense of home, till you find your sacred knowing in and of this world, till you find your own language for it." I do not know of another congregation in this County that can offer such a safety net of diverse religious knowing. UUFHC is the only congregation that welcomes in and wrestles with many, many metaphors of meaning and styles of love in the vital work of creating a just and compassionate world. And, yes, we are also known in this county as a place where justice is earnestly pursued.
I have come to understand more each year that when I have done the best I can with what I have at the moment then it is time to trust in the universe. That which has exquisite beauty does not necessarily have a long shelf life. If you do not know how precious this community is, then it will fade away.
But I submit to you that we haven't seen the half of it. I believe we have the power to amaze each other, enrich this community and help heal the world. I hope you see that too. Amen.
Copyright © 2003 Lisa G. Ward. All Rights Reserved.